just tell him i said nine months
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Farmville is her only friend.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
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