somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
