Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Randomize
