You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I think people are normalizing furries
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
