I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
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