He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
cat food counts as protein by the way
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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