DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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