I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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