So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written