There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
