So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
