Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Randomize
