just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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