He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Randomize
