dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
My cat gives me a boner
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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