the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
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Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
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IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again