You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
