would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
PANTIES FOUND
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