is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
