fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
