Define "chronic" masturbator.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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