I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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