Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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