It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
