Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Girls should come with a carfax report
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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