Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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