How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
