So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
