I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
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I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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