You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm drive I can fine osifer
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
