So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
