i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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