i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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