You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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