you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
