my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize