piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
