why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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