Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
