My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Randomize