Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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