i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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