Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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