She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Randomize