just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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