Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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