I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
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tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
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had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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