the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
even my farts smell like vagina
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
