we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
