I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I met the friendliest cop last night
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
