This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina