Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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