we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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